Dear Well Meaning White, Ableist Friends

It happens every time the media highlights racist comments made by “good” white people. Every time.

Those friends I have who don’t care much for social media, who don’t post a lot, and generally like to do other things with their time, suddenly come out of the woodwork to post things similar to this:

“So the media says wealthy and good Bob White is a racist because he said something in private that should have never been made public. But, the media never want to tell you about Joe Black, hater of White people who shot 14 White babies with a stolen gun, called the judge a Looser-Face Cracker before showing his underwear all the way down to there, and he even had an iPhone that I know he bought with FOOD STAMPS!”

And then, after they make their There-I-Said-What-Everyone-Was-Afraid-To-Say post, I see all these well educated, kind, and meek friends LIKING that post.

Dear Well-Meaning Friends: WTF!?

Where is your pain? Show me your pain and I will punch you right there so you can feel what it’s like. But, I don’t even know if they have any pain, not like that. Most of the people commenting things like that just borrow pain from someone they heard say something one time about a Black man getting something that should have gone to a White man.

You don’t get to say what should and shouldn’t hurt somebody based on what does and doesn’t hurt worse than their complaint. If someone is hurt by something and all you care about is that it might make you look bad, then your flaw is bigger than racism. And trying to excuse “good people” racism by pointing out a few assholes from the offended race is, yes, IS racist. No race is short of jackasses, check the mirror.

Do you actually intend your message to be: “It’s okay for Bob White to say bad things about Black people as a whole because there are Black people worse than Bob White?” <<<<< News flash: There are also White people worse than Bob White AND worse than Joe Black! A-ha! What did I win? (nothing… see that? I won nothing.)

I run into this same disconnect with the word “retard” as well. Such-Good-People will throw that word out there as a punchline and cackle with laughter, then turn right around and share a meme about “Disabled children aren’t weird….”. I just laughed so hard at the joke about “When I said I wanted a man to make me feel special, I didn’t mean for him to hand me a helmet and some crayons.” No, actually, I didn’t laugh… That’s right, now I remember. What I did was think about my autistic son and his disabled peers. And I thought about the reasons why some kids wear those helmets. And I wanted to hurt people. So, come on and show me your pain so I can punch you right there. And I won’t give you a helmet first. Laugh with me, people!

Did I mention just how kind and loving these people are? Family people. Christians. Good American Citizens. Loving Parents. All That. THEY ARE SO SUPPORTIVE OF CHARITABLE CAUSES. There are no better people on Earth.

And oh, Hell yes, you can say whatever you like. You can say so much offensive crap that you’ll earn yourself a “Free Speech Gold Medal”. You can hang that baby up right beside “World’s Biggest Asshole” award. You Rock!